From Berlin to a new beginning: Laura’s year of transformation
- Patricia Abarte
- Jun 21
- 4 min read
Many expats imagine that moving abroad will solve everything. A new city, a new career, new experiences — and for a while, it does. But after years overseas, many people reach a crossroads.
Should you stay? Should you go home? Should you change careers? Or is it time to build an entirely new chapter somewhere else?
In this episode of This Expat Life, I sit down with Laura Burtenshaw to explore exactly what it feels like to be stuck abroad — and how taking ownership of your life can open the door to an expat new beginning, even before anything on the outside has changed.
Listen to the episode here:
Timestamps:
00:48 - Meet Laura: From London to Berlin and Back Again
02:06 - Life Before The Co-Pilot: Unfulfilled and Stuck in a Cycle
05:06 - Job Change or Location Change? It Was Always Both
06:10 - Why Quitting Without a Plan Wasn't the Answer
08:48 - Overcoming Hesitations: Low Confidence and Overthinking
12:08 - Favorite Exercises: Wheel of Life and Who's Driving Your Bus
16:12 - The Belief Reality Loop: Taking Control of Her Own Destiny
17:19 - Finding Connection in the Group (Even as a Self-Reliant Person)
19:11 - One Year Later: What's Actually Changed
23:24 - Laura's Advice: Improve Your Life 1% Without Waiting for the Big Decision
Burnout Isn't Always About Your Job
After nearly nine years living in Berlin, Laura found herself exhausted.
Following an inspiring three-month sabbatical travelling through Asia, returning to her corporate role felt heavier than ever. The work demanded enormous energy but left her feeling disconnected from what she actually wanted.
Like many ambitious professionals, she tried to solve the problem by thinking harder. She explored therapy. She tried one-on-one coaching. She spent countless hours reflecting. Yet nothing created the momentum she was looking for.
Instead, she found herself trapped in overthinking — pouring all of her energy into work while neglecting herself. Her me time became scrolling social media and imagining a different future rather than actively creating one.
When Career Decisions Become Life Decisions
For expats, changing jobs rarely means just changing jobs.
A career decision often comes bundled with questions about where to live, whether to return home, how close to be to family, and what kind of life you ultimately want to build. Laura realised that while Berlin had offered incredible experiences and friendships, it had never truly felt like home. She missed being closer to family in the UK and knew she eventually wanted to return.
The challenge wasn't knowing what she wanted. It was finding the confidence to start moving toward it.
The Trap of Waiting
One of Laura's biggest breakthroughs came from recognising that she was waiting for someone — or something — to change her life for her.
She wasn't applying for new opportunities because all her energy went into her current role. She wasn't creating momentum because she believed the big decision had to come first. This mindset is incredibly common among expats. We convince ourselves that once we have the perfect plan, everything else will fall into place. But often, waiting simply keeps us stuck.
Small Actions Create Big Change
Inside The Co-Pilot, Laura discovered that an expat new beginning doesn't start with one giant leap. It starts with small, intentional actions.
Several exercises became turning points for her. The Wheel of Life highlighted where her energy was being drained. The Who's Driving Your Bus exercise helped her identify the competing voices inside her mind. And the Belief Reality Loop challenged the limiting beliefs that had kept her stuck for years.
Rather than trying to solve every problem overnight, Laura began making small changes that reflected the person she wanted to become.
One example: she loves bringing people together. Instead of telling herself she needed a bigger apartment to host friends, she simply started organising monthly meetups at local cafés and bars. She returned to hosting events for Berlin's international community. She led hiking groups. She reconnected with the activities that made her feel like herself again.
These weren't massive life changes. But together, they created a huge shift in how she experienced her everyday life.
Progress Doesn't Always Look Dramatic
A year later, Laura still lives in Berlin. She still works for the same company. From the outside, it might seem like very little has changed.
But internally, everything feels different.
She has stronger boundaries. She invests less energy into things that don't serve her. She celebrates small wins instead of focusing only on distant goals. Most importantly, she trusts herself again. Instead of waiting for life to happen, she is actively creating it. She knows where she is heading — even if she is still figuring out exactly when she will arrive.
She describes her journey using the metaphor of flying. When she first started, her plane felt grounded by a storm. Today, she is in the air. There is still turbulence. There are still uncertainties. But she is moving. And that is what matters.
Your Expat New Beginning Starts Now
One of the most powerful messages from this conversation is that your life is not on hold while you figure everything out.
Many of us believe: once I move, then I'll be happy. Once I get the new job, then I'll start living. Once I settle down, then I'll build community. But waiting postpones life.
You don't have to solve your entire future today. You simply need to take the next meaningful step. Small actions build confidence. Confidence creates momentum. Momentum leads to clarity. And clarity helps you create a life that feels authentically yours.
If you've been waiting for permission to move forward, let Laura's story be your reminder: your expat new beginning starts the moment you decide to take the wheel.
This is what I dive into in episode #112 of This Expat Life.
Listen here:
If any of these notes resonated with you, and you would like to explore more of yourself, my programs are the right containers for you to accelerate your growth or your next chapter:
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