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"I Make Expats Cry So They’ll Feel Happy”: Unpacking the Paradox of True Emotional Release

Writer's picture: socialwtmariellesocialwtmarielle

“I make expats cry so that they'll feel happy,” I jokingly said to an old friend who asked what I was doing these days.


But actually, I wasn’t really joking.


The high-achieving expats who start coaching with me are smart, sharp, and quick thinkers. Their rational, cognitive side is well developed - their emotional side, not so much.


"I think I feel …" is something you’ll hear them say when you ask them about their emotions. They love analyzing their feelings. Their head is dominant, while their emotions and body take a backseat.


They are basically walking heads.


(And with ‘they’ I also mean my old self, obvio 😉).


While they might believe they are in touch with their feelings, there is definitely room for growth.


Because thinking about emotions is not the same as feeling emotions.


Analyzing feelings is just another way to avoid the depth - and pain - of these feelings.


But what happens when we don’t make space for our emotions?


They continue to be there and start bugging us, pressing on us from the undertow. They influence our thoughts and behavior until they finally get the attention they deserve.


And ultimately, they prevent us from truly feeling happy, because we always carry other emotional weight with us (although we are often not aware of this).


So what might appear contradictory is something I now live by:


Allowing ‘negative’ emotions in is the only way to feel truly happy in the long term.


So yes, I make expats cry… 😉 And they all feel relieved afterward 🙌.


Curious? Schedule a free discovery call - you can find the link here! Let’s explore how allowing your emotions to surface can lead to deeper, long-lasting happiness.



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