A friend recently confessed that a conflict at work kept him up at night – whereas he normally was a good sleeper, he now found himself tossing and turning.
“I tried to tell myself that the conflict wasn’t actually so bad and that we were already working it out, yet I couldn’t seem to let it go and fall asleep.”
This didn’t surprise me.
A lot of the high-achievers that I coach and that I surround myself with are smart and know how to solve things with their head. Their rationality and willpower get them far in life and their career.
And they (unconsciously) approach issues like the one my friend had in the same way. An emotion comes up, and they try to ‘rationalise it away’. They tell themselves it isn’t all too bad – basically saying there’s no reason to feel that way.
But here's the catch: when deeper issues are triggered, a mere mental approach won't cut it.
Take my friend's experience. His work conflict wasn't just a professional hiccup; it triggered a childhood fear rooted in a home where handling disagreements was anything but healthy. His insomnia wasn't because of the current issue; it was because of the past.
And he could give all his rational arguments about why this work conflict wasn’t a big thing, but of course, it wouldn’t do anything about his underlying fear – or make him fall asleep.
How many times have you tried reasoning away your emotions? 🤔 It's time to shift gears and connect with those deeper layers.
Next time you find yourself lying awake at night, try this instead: tune in to your body and ask yourself where you know this feeling from and what you’re really afraid of, angry, or sad about.
And give yourself the space to simply sit (or lie down) with the emotions that come up. That’s it.
Sometimes the answer is much simpler than your rational brain believes it can be 🙃
🙋♀️ Hi, I'm Amanda, life coach for high-achieving expats
🙌 I've guided over 100 expats to know themselves on a deeper level, so they could create a global life they feel truly happy in
🇧🇷 Currently living my own happy life in Rio
📞 Curious what I could do for you? Schedule a free 45-min discovery call here!
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